Sunday, July 12, 2009

When things isn't ..

Our life is actually black and white and the journey of it brings colours to it, whether it is bright colours or dull ones, depending. Every individual lead a different life, experience different things, and that is why each and everyone of us is called, individuals.

Sometimes, things that happen are all happy moments, you feel at the top of your life, everything that happened was just exactly the way you wanted, cheerful, optimisitc, positive ... only those words could describe you and nothing about the negatives. However, we have ying, and there must be yang to balance your life out. Therefore, there are times when you feel down and low too, and you feel rather sad and persimistic, you wanna lock yourself in the room because you feel so shitty that you just do not wanna meet with people. It's the downturn of your life that you just do not know how to handle it. Things happen for a reason. A positive person doesn't mean he or she can handle it all the time. The moment it passes the border, probably most living humans could not take it anymore, being rejected my friends and families, anything that happen seems to be going against you with or without an intention. Even the smallest things could cause you an emotional breakdown at this point of your life.

You feel the world is so huge, so wide, and there are so many people living in this world and the frequent question you wanna ask is why does it happen to you. Why are you the one being picked. The many people that live here, they breathe in very easily, without any difficulties, but it seems that even getting air to breathe, you feel so suffocated. You dread and you feel life is indeed meaningless. The torment to endure is getting unbearable. You could not withstand the pain, the agony that has been with you. You wanna end this, but you do not know how and from where. You feel you are such a failure in life. You feel very unstable emotionally, one minute can be so happy and the other when you are slapped with reality, it goes downhill. Anxiety, depression, sorrow, is the words that could only describe you. You used to have a very good appetite and just one day it came, you lost all your appetite. You feel hungry but whatever that goes it seems tasteless and you weight had gone down tremendously. Each passing day, each passing second and each passing moment is such a nightmare to you.

If there is nobody to listen to, when you call for people, nobody is there for you, you could only feel the knock on the wall, surrounded by 4 cubicles, call this number, 1300-13-1300. It's McDonald's HAHAHA... It makes you happy. =p

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