Saturday, November 9, 2013

Who is it for?

There has been a viral on Facebook on "marriage is not for me." At some point of your life, you will need to face this. It's okay if you do not want to get married, or it's not time yet or any other reasons which I can't think of now.

But, it's a new insight on marriage. You get married for your partner, it's because you want your spouse to be happy, to see him/her smile, to bring laughter to that person, and what you can give to him or her. It's about making the other person happy.

It makes me realize how many people got married for the wrong reason if it's based on this reason. At the same time, I feel that you need to take into consideration what do you want. I know this may sound selfish, but humans are selfish, we can't be Saints. It's great if you wanna please your partner, but I feel there should only be a certain extent and you don't always have to appease everyone. Sometimes, it's not that both parties wanna get married, but the peer pressure, the family pressure that ends up both getting married at the wrong time. You can't be all understanding and open and still does things for your partner if they are having affairs, right?

Regardless, this is an over-rated commitment and it's creepy. There are people who told me before that they wanna get married at a certain age. That's not willingness. That's called age limitation and because time waits for no one, they accelerate of finding a partner and settle for the second best when the time comes. Sometimes, these people don't even feel they wanna get married. It's more like because one party wants it, they adhere to it. When asked how do they feel about it? Their answer? "I don't feel anything." That must be a very happy family after they get married. It's a sign that you are not into your partner.

This is about 2 families being united as one. You cannot ignore or neglect your partner, nor yourself. It can't be all about them, nor it can't be all about yourself. It's just like compromise.

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